Friday, December 12, 2014

Want to go out?


I'm tired. Been working all day.

I've been couped up in here all day. I want to go out.

Fine. So go out.

Fine. I will.

Fine.

Fine.

Fine, I'll wash up. Maybe a shower will make me feel better.

Need any help?

Mmmm. Well, yeah. But then we'll never get out of here.

Ok. Fine.

I didn't mean...

No. No. That's Ok. Take your shower. By yourself!

Fine! I will!

Fine!


....Feel better?

Yeah. Anything else you need to do? Wash the dishes? Do the laundry? Dust the blinds?

Ok. I'm sorry. Let's go.

Where are we going?

Where do you want to go?

I don't know. Where do you want to go?

It was your idea to go out.

Fine. We'll stay home.

I just took a shower.

Oh. So you only take showers when we go out, in case you see a hot girl?

No. Come on.

Oh yes you do. Like that time we were at Jake's and that woman with the skirt up her ass walks by and drops a spoon and bends over to pick it up? I thought you were going to fall out of your chair.

No I wasn't.

Everyone else saw you look at her too.

Hey. Can I help it if she made a spectacle of herself?

You didn't have to look.

What was I supposed to do? Make believe she wasn't there?

Yes.

Ok. Fine. Next time I won't look. I'm sorry. So you want to stay in then?

No. I want to go out. I've been couped up here all day. All week. You spend the whole day out there doing stuff. I'm stuck here.

I work all day. I'm not out having fun.

Oh really? You don't pal around with your friends or that girl, Angela.

Angela? How do you know about Angela?

Oh. So there is something going on. What is it? An office affair? You guys do it in a closet or something?

What? No. I hardly ever even see her.

But when you do, I'll bet it's hot and heavy for at least three minutes.

When did you ever hear about Angela?

You told me about her. She has a husband. They have an open marriage. They always talk about science and technology.

Oh yeah. Right.

Is that what you want, an open marriage?

What? No. I just thought it was interesting.

Well guess what mister? It ain't gonna happen. You want to have sex with other women then just go do it.

I don't want to have sex with other women.

So you're gay?

I don't fucking believe this conversation. Let's go out somewhere.

Where?

How about a gay bar?

Oh. So you know where all the gay bars are.

Yeah. Right.

I knew it! I see how all those gay guys looks at your with their gaydar.

Really? They do?

Yeah. You look good.

Oh great. Just what I need.

Women look at you too.

No they don't.

Why do you think that girl dropped her spoon in front of you. You guys are unbelievable. A woman has to sit on your face before you get the message.

What am I supposed to do?

Take me out once in a while.

Ok. So lets go.

Ok.

Fine.

It's raining.

Oh yeah. I forgot. That hurricane's supposed to hit.

Everything will be closed.

Great.

You took a shower for nothing.

No. I feel better. And I like staying in with you after being out working all week.

You want to stay in and I want to go out.

I'll take you out. Come on.

What are we going to do? Drive around in the rain in a ghost town. Everybody left for higher ground.

So if you knew that, why did you want to go out?

Because I'm couped up in here all week.

So lets go out and watch the hurricane.

Isn't it dangerous?

Nah. It could be dangerous here.

That's why everyone left town.

The hurricane lost a lot of ground. It's only gusting to like 65 miles per hour. It's not going to kill us.

Well lets wait it out and see if it passes by.

The cable is out.

Oh great. Where's that stupid beeping message that comes on in the middle of a movie?

Probably the people who made it somewhere safe, hundreds of miles away, are getting it.

Must be exciting for them.

Maybe we can go out and find one of those newscasters being blown around in the wind.

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